In the run-up to an election, it's not uncommon for special interest groups to release ads pushing a specific agenda in the hopes of swaying voters as they head to the polls. But only once in a generation does a social awareness ad reach the heights of hyperbole-murdering crazy reached by this anti-contraception spot, released by a group of nuns in Ohio who hope to convince fellow Catholics that "contracepting" is responsible for all manner of social ills, from homosexuality to beastiality to straight up murder. What other lessons can we learn from the awesomely insane YOU DESERVE TO KNOW THE TRUTH: CONTRACEPTION? Let's take a journey through the 14 most important "facts."
1. Birth control will make it so no man wants to have sex with you.
This is because chemicals in hormones interfere with phermones, which render women ugly to men. That's why no one has sex anymore. Because men are just totally turned off by women, because of birth control.
2. Contraception confuses men and has led to an exponential increase in sluttery.
"Studies have shown that men are more attracted to more average, fertile women than they are even to super models," according to the video. Studies! Can't argue with studies!
To make up for the dearth in female attractiveness, women have to try extra hard to attract a man, painting themselves up like Whores of Babylon and opening their legs to whoever. The video, again,
Contracepting women degrade themselves through immodest dress and action in an attempt to attract men who are confused from a lack of fertile women.
Thanks to stupid birth control, nowadays, 9% of women and 29% of men have had more than 15 sexual partners. And at least 10% of women are lying to say that they have fewer than 15 sexual partners, because come on. Everyone I know has had sex with more than 15 people.
3. Whore pills will cause your monkey husband to divorce you, and then turn gay.
Unfortunately, because of the confusing chemicals in birth control significantly reducing the number of attractive women, men are really having a rough time. "What is a man to do when the majority of women are contracepting, and he no longer finds them desirable?" laments the concerned lady voiceover.
Are you ready for another science bomb brought to you by that historical bastion of science known as the Catholic church? Someone did a study in the 70's that found that giving monkey women the Depo Provera shot caused the alpha monkey male to stop being attracted to them. After all of the females in his cage area were given Depo shots, the alpha male started having sexual intercourse with boy monkeys.
Ergo, birth control will turn your boyfriend gay, because humans are exactly like monkeys in every way.
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